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tv   Late Night With Jimmy Fallon  NBC  October 9, 2013 12:35am-1:35am EDT

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>> steve: from studio 6a in rockefeller center, the national broadcasting company presents -- tonight's guest is -- and featuring the legendary roots crew. d here he is -- jimmy fallon! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: that's what i'm talking about. hot crowd! great new york city crowd here tonight. welcome, everybody. oh, looking good. welcome. thank you so much. welcome. we're going to have fun tonight. welcome to "late night with jimmy fallon." i'm so excited. we have miley cyrus on the show
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tonight. [ cheers and applause ] when they heard that, our wardrobe department said, "sweet, a night off." [ laughter ] it's been great. [ laughter ] it's been great having miley around the show today. she's a good sport. but, she did make a promise. she said, "don't do any twerking jokes." and i said, "hey, twerks for me." [ laughter and applause ] ♪ working my way back to you ♪ jersey boys. jersey boys. >> steve: twerky boys. >> jimmy: paul mccartney was here last night. i said, "paul, can we sing we can twerk it out?" [ laughter ] [ as mccartney ] "i'm leaving right now. i'm quitting the business. good-bye. if you're getting the 'tonight show,' you can't do jokes like that. i'll that you that much." paul said that, yeah. [ as mccartney ] "i wasn't the walrus." that's what he said on the way out. that's confusing. that's confusing. >> steve: why would he do that to you? >> jimmy: gobbledygook, yeah. the big tv news, you guys, here.
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it's rumored that after eight seasons, e! might actually cancel "keeping up with the kardashians." [ cheers and applause ] because of bad ratings. >> steve: ooh. >> jimmy: yeah. no word on what the kardashians will do next or what they were doing before. [ laughter ] no word. no one knows. >> steve: shopping? [ applause ] >> jimmy: that's right ratings for "keeping up with the kardashians" are the worst they've ever been. producers on the show are like, "maybe if one of you made a sex tape." [ light laughter ] and bruce jenner was like -- [ as jenner ] "if you think it will help." no, not you bruce. get out of here! get out of the -- any of you guys. [ laughter ] [ as jenner ] "let's start now." some good news. especially, if you're into the space program. i love space. >> steve: he loves it!
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>> jimmy: nasa just said that its next mission to mars, which is called maven, is still on despite the government shutdown. that is so maven. [ laughter ] three people get the reference. >> steve: yeah, come on. ♪ donuts. [ as mccartney ] >> jimmy: "well, i'm going to quit the business, if this keeps up. i mean, even raven symone isn't laughing. i mean, no one likes it." [ light laughter ] this government shutdown seems to be affecting everyone, even people overseas. in fact, this week china warned the u.s. that not raising the debt ceiling will hurt the chinese economy. then the u.s. said, "no worries. we'll just loan you some of your money." [ laughter and applause ] it will make you feel better. it's not ours anyway. we're both screwed. it's been a rough week for members of congress. they're under a lot of pressure with the shutdown mess. very, very unpopular. [ light laughter ]
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i've been using rosetta stone. i try to sneak one in there. word a day calendar. [ speaking spanish ] >> steve: exactly. muy populare. [ as mccartney ] >> jimmy: yeah, yeah. >> steve: "that's no good, jimmy." >> jimmy: "no, it means library." [ laughter ] >> steve: really? >> jimmy: yeah. but, this video didn't help. did you see this? north carolina congressman george holding was overseeing a session in the house of representatives. and while one of his fellow congressmen gave a speech, holding fell asleep. [ laughter ] let's check it out. look at this. >> it's about trying to do what's right for the whole country. and if your heart -- [ laughter ] >> jimmy: what, huh? like -- [ cheers and applause ] like the dude in "rear window." you ever seen "rear window"? when the catches him murdering -- >> steve: yeah. >> jimmy: raymond burr. you know it's bad when even the dudes who are on c-span can't stay awake watching c-span. what was that guy's name in "rear window"? >> steve: raymond burr. >> jimmy: raymond burr.
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that's "ironside" the original. >> steve: is that right? >> jimmy: yes. and he caught -- jimmy stewart. >> steve: yes. [ as stewart ] "i have my binoculars here. a peeping tom." and he, like, kills his wife. going, "i'm going to get you" or something like that. >> steve: he was a photographer. >> jimmy: you guys have to see "rear window." [ laughter ] >> steve: it's better than we're describing it. i'm getting old! [ as mccartney ] >> jimmy: "that 'rear window' actor is really good on 'back in the business.' unlike that alfred hitchcock joke, very topical." you're being sarcastic. [ as mccartney ] "i am, i am. [ laughter ] i was the sarcastic one." this is just a crazy story. police in california are trying to find the owner of a boat that crashed into a nude beach last week, while carrying 80 pounds of marijuana. [ laughter ] not good. i mean, the last thing you want to see at a nude beach is a bunch of fatties. [ laughter ] bad choice, bad choice.
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[ cheers and applause ] what do you think i was talking about? >> steve: i thought you were being -- >> jimmy: no, no, no. >> steve: i thought you were being blunt? >> jimmy: joint. >> steve: i thought you were being blunt. >> jimmy: no. [ laughter ] no. i did not. >> steve: no. >> jimmy: no. but, police are looking for the owner of that boat, crashed into a nude beach with 80 pounds of weed. officials describe the suspect as matthew mcconaughey. [ laughter and applause ] i knew it. he knows he did it. >> steve: he knows he did it. [ as mcconaughey ] >> jimmy: "all right, all right, all right." [ applause ] paradise now. all right. all right. all right. higgins, you are italian, aren't you? >> steve: yes, i am. >> jimmy: now, you know that columbus discovered america. don't you know? >> steve: that's what i've been taught in school. >> jimmy: yes. well, actually, there's a new study that claims the chinese may have discovered america 70 years before christopher columbus. >> steve: what? >> jimmy: and if you want to know what it would be like if china owned america, give it
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another week or two. [ laughter and applause ] look out the window, buddy. the whole thing. [ light laughter ] the backpack your kids are wearing to school. look at this walmart. the whole thing -- what are you yelling at me for? move your car. [ laughter ] i don't know what to think of this. a zoo in england says that a female chimp just gave birth to twins even though she's been on birth control. officials say the chimp got pregnant because antibiotics caused her birth control to stop working. but the chimp said, "actually, it was to save my marriage." [ laughter ] and i cant believe this. halloween is almost here, you guys. you guys psyched for halloween? [ cheers ]
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i love halloween! young, old. everyone loves halloween. just a few weeks away. and apparently, americans are expected to spend less money on costumes this year than they did in 2012. money's tight. so i mean, it's just going to be awkward when people are like, "let me guess, slutty clown?" [ laughter ] and you're like, "i didn't buy a costume this year." great party, dave. [ laughter ] ♪ twerkin' my way back to you babe and i've been twerkin' my way back to you ♪ >> jimmy: it's jersey boys with "z." >> steve: yeah, with a "z" because it's modern. >> jimmy: actually, they're also saying that people are cutting corners by buying cheap knockoff candy for halloween. [ audience oohs ] i think it's going to be pretty obvious. we have some examples here i want to show you guys. you might want to stay away from this. first up, we have n & n's. i mean, you can tell. there's a little, subtle difference. >> steve: yeah, not good. >> jimmy: it kind of tastes like
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chocolate. >> steve: it's chocolate like. >> jimmy: kind of, yeah. this next one i think will disappoint a lot of kids. this is salmon joy. [ laughter ] sounds gross, but you need those omega 3's, you guys. you're going to need those omega 3's. [ laughter ] next one is a healthy replacement for candy corn. it's called just corn. you give kids corn. you go, "deal with it." you figure it out. dressed as a scientist, huh? you figure it out. i don't know how popular this one's going to be. this is the last one. brother finger. [ audience ohs ] >> steve: you don't know where that's been. >> jimmy: they can get in a lot of trouble for that. >> steve: yeah, a lot of trouble. >> jimmy: a lot of letters -- a lot of letters for that. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: this is not good here, you guys. a new study found that american
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workers lack the problem solving skills that workers in other countries have. when american workers heard about this study, they were like, "what should we do?" [ laughter ] what should we do? this is just weird. officials in kuwait claim they have a new test that can detect gay people and prevent them from entering the country. not to be confused with that other way to prevent people from entering kuwait, a sign that says, "welcome to kuwait." yeah, i don't to be -- i made a mistake. sorry. and finally, if you're watching football this year, you probably know that our new york giants are having a really rough season. not doing well. so i guess there's a strip club here in new york that says it will stop showing giants games because their losing streak has been so bad for business. [ light laughter ] which makes sense. because if there's one thing guys at strip clubs don't need
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to see is a bunch of dudes who can't score. [ laughter ] we have a great show for you tonight! give it up for the roots! ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: welcome to our show! i'm looking forward to this show. we've had a great show all this week. yesterday we had paul mccartney on the show. if you haven't seen it, go on youtube and watch it or or or hulu. whatever you can see it -- i don't know how else you can see our show. >> questlove: youtube. >> jimmy: youtube. i said that yeah. >> questlove: oh. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: don't get so sad about it. but paul mccartney came to the show yesterday, and he played his new song. and then, i'm not joking, he played for 45 minutes.
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he played 10 beatles songs just for the crowd and the crew here. and it was unbelievable. we're going to release it, i think. yeah, it's going to cost a million dollars to clear deals. [ laughter ] all we can only do two seconds of each. ♪ hey that's all you can do. ♪ hey that's it, yeah. ♪ ha that's it. ♪ oh that's all. all your favorite music. ♪ in that's all you can -- ♪ let it that's it. ♪ make it's a great compilation. ♪ help that's all you can do. man, oh, man. it was good. it was just unbelievable. and he's got a new record out october 15th. so, we want to thank paul mccartney and his amazing crew and his band. they're just so nice. and just treated everyone so nice. [ cheers and applause ] you can be nice. you can be famous and be nice. it's not that hard. speaking of nice. we love this girl. she's one of the biggest stars right now in the world. oh, my gosh. her new album "bangerz" is out today and went straight to
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number one. i'm talking smash hit, dude. 70 countries. this girl's doing it. she's going to sing her smash hit "wrecking ball" tonight. miley cyrus is with us, and it's going to be great! [ cheers and applause ] hey, guys, it's time to take a look at the stories making headlines today and weigh the good with the bad. it's time for "pros and cons." here we go. ♪ pros and cons and pros and cons and pros ♪ >> jimmy: tonight, we'll be taking a look at the pros and cons of going to outer space. ooh. people are doing this now. there's the virgin galactic, richard branson. he's like, "let's get our party on." he's going to go up into space and party in space. that's what he wants to do now. and people are shelling out lots of dough to go. >> steve: lots of green. >> jimmy: kutch. >> steve: the kutch is going? >> jimmy: beibs. >> steve: beibs. >> jimmy: harry styles. >> steve: stylesy's going? >> jimmy: stylesy's going. >> steve: beibs and the kutch. >> jimmy: and the kutch. and i heard brad pitt. >> steve: bri pitt?
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>> jimmy: bri pitt? it's a weird nickname. but yeah, bri pitt is going. i am not attending. >> steve: no. you are not going. >> jimmy: i'm like, "hey, when's the second flight?" [ laughter ] i don't trust that thing, man. >> steve: and it's coming -- no! it's not. >> jimmy: making history. yeah, yeah. and also, that movie "gravity." did you guys see that movie? it opened up at the box office, a giant hit. everybody is talking about it. space is very hot right now! very hot! that's my agent. you know what's very hot right now? space! let's take a look at the pros and cons of going to outer space. here we go. pro, boldly going where no man has gone before. con, or as the guys from "duck dynasty" call that, the barber. [ cheers and applause ] long hair, long beard. pro, getting contacted by a strange alien life-form. con, wondering how gary busey got your number. [ audience ohs ]
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[ as busey ] "i can see the rainbow squirrel." pro, looking down on earth from hundreds of miles away. con, realizing you left the oven on in your apartment. can we turn around? please, go back. >> steve: stylesy. >> jimmy: stylesy, anyone? >> jimmy: pro, the temperature often fluctuates between extremely cold and extremely hot. con, it's a cosmic phenomenon known as space menopause. google it. >> steve: google it. >> jimmy: google it if you don't believe me. >> steve: don't believe it? google it. >> jimmy: pro, seeing a black hole. con, realizing it's just uranus. >> steve: wait, what? [ audience ohs ] come on, what? >> jimmy: did you write that? that is upsetting, right? >> steve: that is upsetting. >> jimmy: now, did you write that joke? >> steve: yeah. >> jimmy: i knew that you wrote it. pro, it's the only way to experience the feeling of weightlessness. con, besides hanging out in snoop dogg's dressing room. ♪ yeah, whoa and a yeah, oh come on in ♪
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♪ hey brother jimmy come on ♪ what's up baby bubba what you doing ♪ [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> steve: your gin and juice, sir. >> jimmy: yeah, very good. and finally, pro, hearing mission control say, "we have liftoff." con, followed by, "that's what she said." there you go. that's the "pros and cons." we'll be back with more "late night" and miley cyrus. oh, my goodness! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ [ female announcer ] degree antiperspirant does more for you, so you can do more. ♪ ♪ only degree has motionsense activated by your movement,
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♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: welcome back. everybody, welcome back. thank you for watching us. thank you for being here. we're so excited. miley cyrus is with us tonight. [ cheers and applause ] we love her. in fact, our office is -- pretty much everybody in our office is obsessed with -- ♪ we can't stop and we won't stop ♪ we were just singing -- it's a great song. so earlier today, me, miley and the roots got together and recorded an acapella version of "we can't stop." check it out. ♪ it's our party we can do what we want ♪ ♪ it's our party we can say what we want ♪ ♪ it's our party
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we can love who we want ♪ ♪ we can kiss who we want we can sing what we want ♪ ♪ go miley ♪ red cups and sweaty bodies everywhere ♪ ♪ hands in the air like we don't care ♪ ♪ 'cause we came to have so much fun now ♪ ♪ bet somebody here might get some now ♪ ♪ if you're not ready to go home can i get a "hell no" ♪ ♪ 'cause we're gonna go all night till we see the sunlight all right ♪ ♪ so la-da-di-da-di we like to party ♪ ♪ dancing with molly doing whatever we want ♪ ♪ this is our house this is our rules ♪ we can't stop we won't stop can't you see it's we who own the night ♪ ♪ can't you see it's we who 'bout that life ♪ ♪ we can't stop we won't stop ♪ ♪ we run things
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things don't run we ♪ ♪ we don't take nothing from nobody yeah, yeah yeah ♪ ♪ ♪ to my home girls here with the big butt shaking it like we at a strip club ♪ ♪ remember only god can judge ya forget the haters 'cause somebody loves ya ♪ ♪ everyone in line in the bathroom trying to get a line in the bathroom ♪ ♪ we all so turned upere getting turned up, yeah yeah, yeah, yeah ♪ ♪ la-da-di-da-di we like to party ♪ ♪ dancing with molly doing whatever we want ♪ ♪ this is our house this is our rules we can't stop and we won't stop ♪ ♪ can't you see it's we who own the night
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can't you see it's we who 'bout that life ♪ ♪ we can't stop and we won't stop ♪ ♪ 'cause we run things things don't run we we don't take nothing from nobody ♪ ♪ yeah, yeah [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: hey, how did we do that?! how did we do that?! how did we do that? >> steve: i don't know. >> jimmy: how did we do that?! oh, my goodness. you guys are awesome. the roots, right there. oh, my gosh. [ cheers and applause ] stick around, everybody. we'll be right back with miley cyrus. come on back. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ [ male announcer ] applebee's doesn't just give you juicy steak.
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♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: we are joined tonight by a music industry superstar. she killed it hosting "saturday night live" this weekend. her new album "bangers" came out today, and it's all ready at the top of the worldwide charts. please welcome to the show -- she can't stop! she won't stop! say hello to miley cyrus! ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: miley, you look beautiful. >> thank you. >> jimmy: welcome back to the show. congratulations. holy moly! >> i'm so excited. >> jimmy: number one in 70 countries. oh, my goodness. >> yes. >> jimmy: you're having a good day today. >> i am. besides the fact that i'm catching pneumonia in your
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studio right now. >> jimmy: it's very cold. [ laughter ] but, have you to wear clothes when you come on here. [ laughter ] that's how you make it warmer. >> i asked if i could bring a blanket, and they looked at me like i was crazy. >> jimmy: we could probably get you a blanket. hook you up. can we get miley a blanket, please? yeah, we're working on that, pal. thank you for doing that bit, too, with the roots. >> yeah, that was sweet. we should bring that on tour, when i go on the road next year. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: i got to say, you came in to do your part. we blocked out, like, an hour for miley to do her part. she came in nailed it first take. and we're like, can we do another take just for fun? did a second take, nailed it. and then you left, and i was there for two hours sweating, going -- ♪ la da di da di we came to party dancing with molly doing -- da da di what ♪ they go, "can you smile, jimmy? it looks like you're getting your prostate checked. [ laughter ] can you move your face like you're enjoying it?" i go, "i'm so sorry. i'm focusing on my part." >> my favorite part might have been the shame that came over your face when i gave you the "home girls with the big butts." >> jimmy: yeah! >> because you know who we're talking about. >> jimmy: i know.
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i'm working on it. >> when i wrote that, you know who i thought about. >> jimmy: you thought about me. >> fallon. he's going to love this. >> jimmy: i get that all the time. what a big butt i always have. [ light laughter ] great job on "snl" again. i know you're getting props. but, the second tim -- i know -- you know i know "saturday night live." and i watched it. like, i just knew you'd kill it. you know what i like about it is that you have to perform on that show. it's live. >> yeah. it's kind of insane because, for me, there's always people talking obviously about -- no, no one talks about what i do? >> jimmy: no, no, no. >> no one cares. >> jimmy: no one. >> what's great is i can just go under the radar, and i can do whatever i want, and no one cares. >> jimmy: you can just blend on in, yeah. >> but, it was fun for me because everyone always has something to say. and i think, at the end, people forget that what i love to do is -- i grew up performing. very much -- my show was a lot like "snl" in kind of the way that we never knew what was going to be thrown at us. so i feel like that was a good time for me to kind of show people that i don't just twerk and lick stuff. i actually sing, and i can act a little bit, too. >> jimmy: you're great at those things as well.
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i mean, not to knock to that. >> i'm multi-talented. >> jimmy: they're on top on the resume. but, that's the thing, like -- i mean, how old were you when you started? >> i started auditioning when i was 11, and they told me i was too small, too young and had too few of teeth. because i only had about four teeth in my mouth at that time. and those teeth that i did have had big old brackets on them. so i was really cute, basically, is what i'm trying to say. >> jimmy: so cute, yeah. >> so i went in for my first audition, and then i came back with the braces. and they looked at me like, "what happened to her over the summer?" it was the reverse of, like, the ugly duckling. i just kept getting uglier. >> jimmy: no, no. and look at you now. you're beautiful. >> and then it was like two years later. and then, they were like, "okay, fine, fine. we'll hire her." i wouldn't quit going to the auditions. even if they didn't call me back, i would fly myself to l.a. and keep going back. >> jimmy: trying and trying and trying. you sang all your own stuff. and that was the other thing about "snl," to me -- that acoustic version of "we can't stop" -- or "wrecking ball." and you're like, that's powerful. >> thanks. >> jimmy: and it was just great. everyone's just like, "did you get -- oh, she's good." oh, bummer, she's talented.
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the one thing that just stuck in my brain and that gave me nightmares is who got bobby moynihan to do "wrecking ball"? [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] that's just awful. that is awful. that's terrible. >> the thing i love about bobby is he said, that when the "wrecking ball" video came out like a month ago, he texted the whole cast and called "dibs." because he was like, "no one gets this joke. i get to do this." >> jimmy: i got "wrecking ball." i love that he did that. i saw this. you're on the cover of a bunch of magazines. but, i saw this. look at this, all glammed up. this is what i'm talking about. i mean, come on. [ cheers and applause ] do you like getting all dressed up? >> to be honest, not that much. you know, i don't really like getting dressed period, as you can tell. >> jimmy: yeah. well, i've seen other covers, too. there you go. naked and licking something. >> what i'm best at. >> jimmy: yeah, yeah. but this was a really cool article, as well, in "rolling stone." because you went skydiving. >> i did.
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that was really probably one of the craziest things i've ever done. >> jimmy: i don't know why you would want to do that? >> yeah, and i went on a two hour road trip with a journalist, also. which is why some of my story -- a lot of that truth comes out. because you're just like, "oh, i'm just on a drive, going skydiving with my friend." >> jimmy: after two hours, you run out of stories. ah, here comes the truth. yeah, yeah. >> exactly. i don't know if you read. we had one of the best things ever. if you've ever had a burrito burger. >> jimmy: no, i've never heard of it. >> a burrito burger hybrid. it's the best thing you can possibly imagine. >> jimmy: can we get them in new york city? >> it's amazing. this is strictly perris, california, folks. anyone ever been to perris, california? >> jimmy: you can go there, and you can also get -- apparently, you can get a foot tattoo. i can't believe you did this. >> and it's all gone. i got to be honest. i walked it all off. >> jimmy: you got rolling stone tattooed to the bottom of your feet. >> yeah, and what's great is now it's all gone except the "ing" and the money sign. so now i can add anything i want. "ing" anything. >> jimmy: yeah, you can do like -- [ laughter ] fill in the blank. [ cheers ]
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don't do it. fill in the blank at home. we're not doing it here. [ applause ] we found this fan tattoo. gosh, i was crying laughing. some people get good tattoos. some people go for it. some people -- >> are you talking about the one on your back? [ light laughter ] the tramp stamp you have? >> jimmy: i have a tramp stamp on my back. >> of my face. >> jimmy: it's your face next to a yin/yang on fire. >> and it means dance. >> jimmy: the japanese symbol that says "peace" in the mirror. this is a real tattoo that somebody got. gosh, it is unbelievable. props to this person. this is you apparently? [ audience oohs ] [ laughter ] oh, my goodness. this made me laugh. what is going on with this? >> well, it's obviously miley cyrus riding a wrecking ball. >> jimmy: oh, my god. yolo foam finger and just going for it. i was crying looking at it. you look nothing like this, but the idea is there, which is
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great. yeah, i love the idea. >> it's scary. >> jimmy: this guy really went for it, and i really love it. again congrats on this guy, "bangerz" with a "z." i like the look of it. i think it's awesome. i think it's fun. you have so many special guests -- big sean, nelly, ludicrous. britney spears does the first track off the thing with you. are you and britney -- i didn't know if you were friends. did you know each other? did you like each other? >> yeah, for me. because i'm like -- i never knew -- i have so many different people on this record, so many features. and i really wanted to put someone that i felt was just what represented pop music to me. and that was really britney. because so many of my fans have grown up watching me out with so many peoples' first records that they went out and bought. and britney was my first album. i went and bought that and a metallica. that's how bipolar i was at a very young age. and really didn't know who i was. so that was something that was really exciting. and especially, for me, i remember when i had to go buy cds, which is really fun. which i hope people go and still do. they convinced me people still buy cds. >> jimmy: where could i find them? >> i put some stickers in there.
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>> jimmy: walmart and best buy are my top two choices. but, i don't know anymore. i really don't. i'd be like, "it's over there next to the garden hoses." like, oh, that doesn't make sense. i love buying records. i love buying cds. >> me too. i put some posters in there. so it's really kind of old school, where it's like you get gifts with your music. >> jimmy: that's the way you got an album. you say cds, i say albums. i say cassette, my parents say albums. a couple weird people say eight tracks like questlove. he get's eight tracks. >> or a stone and a branch. >> jimmy: yeah, exactly. it goes back a long way. but the album is where it's at. and i got to say, there was a quote from you that said, "i never felt more who i am than i do right now." i know you're feeling free, and you're under a lot of pressure. but boy, oh, boy did you win. and you won big. [ cheers and applause ] >> yeah, i feel so happy and great. thank you. >> jimmy: you won, buddy, you won. our thanks to miley cyrus. go get "bangerz." it's the hottest record in the world. more with miley after the break. come on back! ♪
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♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: welcome back, everybody. we are -- >> we are cold. >> jimmy: what happened? what happened during the commercial break? >> my mom had to give me her blanket because i'm getting the sniffles. and i actually have to go sign 450 autographs after this. >> jimmy: you have to? all right, you'll make it. you'll make it. mom knows best. congratulations again. "bangerz" came out today. all ready top of the charts. congratulations to you for that. >> thank you. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: we're psyched for you! we've known you for a long time. i've known you for a long time. do you remember we did -- this might jog your memory. but, a long time ago, we did a canadian soap opera? >> of course, "jacob's patients." i played the owner of a nail salon, and you were a customer. >> jimmy: i was a customer, that's right. >> that was so much fun. >> jimmy: yeah, uh -- yeah. [ light laughter ] it was, except -- i mean -- >> you're acting kind of weird. >> jimmy: well, don't take this the wrong way. but you were kind of difficult
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to work with. >> what do you mean? >> jimmy: what? >> what do you mean i was difficult to work with? >> jimmy: well, first of all, chill. second of all -- [ laughter ] for one thing, you refused to use your own arms in any of the scenes. do you remember this? >> yeah. well, it was a time in my life where my arms were very tan. they looked like carrot sticks with hands on the ends. i was very self-conscious about it. >> jimmy: whatever the reason. i just -- i'm just going to try not to get mad here. the point is you refused to use your own arms during the shoot. you insisted instead on using fake arms. like mannequin arms. >> true, true. >> jimmy: and then, to make you more comfortable, the director insisted that everybody use fake arms in the scene. i have to say, it made things pretty inconvenient. >> it didn't matter, though. the arms looked really real. >> jimmy: no way! [ laughter ] i disagree with that! and i don't like having my voice this high. what happened? [ laughter ] when i get angry -- [ cheers and applause ]
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i respectfully disagree. i don't think we were fooling anyone. i think we have a clip. can we look at the clip, please? ♪ >> hi, welcome to smiley's nail salon. i'm smiley. >> jimmy: hi, smiley. i'm terry. [ laughter ] very nice to meet you. >> hello. welcome, terry. >> jimmy: yeah, thank you. >> you have very lovely hands. >> jimmy: oh, these old things? no, they're not lovely. in fact, i'm a nail biter. num-num-num-num-num. [ laughter ] >> so what would you like today? a manicure, a pedicure, maybe a brazilian wax? >> jimmy: hey, oh! i think i'll just do the manicure. thank you. >> okay. well, you just go ahead. go ahead and take a seat. we'll get you started. >> jimmy: oh, perfect. that's great. whatever you say. my hands are in your hands. pun intended. [ laughter ] >> i'll pretend i didn't hear that. >> okay. [ laughter ] okay, first things first, let's file those nails.
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>> jimmy: here we go. oh, good. that's a nice file there. >> i'm going to use my favorite nail file just for you. with the polka dots. >> jimmy: oh, we'll use that one? okay, great. yeah, that's good. >> i'm just going to bring your hand to the file. it's a much more effective technique. >> jimmy: really? i've never seen this before. >> much more effective technique. >> jimmy: never seen that. [ laughter ] >> that looks great. >> jimmy: that's beautiful. >> now, it's time for just a little pampering. >> jimmy: ooh-la-la. what do we do? >> can you just dip your hands right in the wax right there? >> jimmy: all right, very good. you want me to go? [ light laughter ] >> this will just soften the skin, while moisturizing it at the same time. >> jimmy: ooh, it kind of tickles. >> that means it's working. now, how about a little neck massage. >> jimmy: oh, gosh. well, all right. wow, really? >> it's important for my customers to be very relaxed and very comfortable. >> jimmy: oh, very nice. [ cheers and applause ] >> don't pretend you don't need it. >> jimmy: no, i didn't know you do facial massages as well. thank you very much. >> we always strive to go the extra mile for our customers.
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>> jimmy: definitely relaxing, i can tell you that much. >> so can you please remove your hand from the wax now? >> absolutely. here we go. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: is that normal? >> absolutely. i can see the improvement all ready. now, it's time to get you some nail polish. >> jimmy: are you sure. i don't think i need any nail polish. >> trust me. trust me. >> jimmy: all right, that's a lot of polish. >> you are going to love these colors. >> jimmy: yeah, yeah. be careful now. >> look at this. we've got this shimmering blue. >> jimmy: okay. >> maybe a little sultry orange. >> jimmy: all right, yeah, yeah. >> a little wrecking ball gray. >> jimmy: very, very nice. that's enough. i think we can stop now. >> no, we won't stop. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: we can't stop? ♪ and we won't stop >> jimmy: i get it. perfect. >> now, just one last drop or two of the midnight black. and we should be done. >> jimmy: ah-ha, ah-ha. actually, they look pretty nice. i mean, they look really, really nice. >> it's a good color for you.
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>> jimmy: thank you. >> now, for the final step, go ahead and just stick those beauties in the heat lamp right here. >> jimmy: okay. now, you want me to put them in the heat lamp. what will that do? >> that will just dry up the polish. it will make those things really permanent. >> jimmy: oh, good, great. i can't wait. how long does it take to dry? [ beep ] >> about that long. >> jimmy: all right, fantastic. i think i saw an extra hand there. [ laughter ] a little hot there! a little hot! midnight black indeed. >> well, you look amazing. how about we finally do that brazilian wax. >> jimmy: now i'm up for it! let's do it! up top! hey, oh! ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: ah, yeah. now, that i see the clip -- wait, where did my jacket go? [ laughter ] your blanket fell off, too. i guess you're right.
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i didn't -- the arms did look pretty real. >> they looked very real. >> jimmy: they did look real. i'm so sorry. i apologize. >> yeah. >> jimmy: all right. you guys, miley cyrus performs her hit song "wrecking ball" after the break. stick around everybody! bangerz! ♪ you want big savings? check this out. hurry into the sears columbus day event and save over $800 on this 29 cubic foot samsung refrigerator. or save 43% on this kenmore washer/dryer pair.
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this is saving big. this is sears. [ tires screech ] [ laughter ] [ screaming ] [ laughter ] [ screaming ] [ woman ] we're going backwards. [ screaming ] [ tires screech ] [ tires screech, screaming ] [ laughter ] [ man ] more power than any hybrid in its class. i'm really impressed! can we get back in line? [ man ] toyota camry hybrid. let's go places. [ man ] toyota camry hybrid. alroh, here.e me your phone. this is the phone you use? yah, it's sweet. do you want the charger? i don't want this. it's a good phone man. no, this is not a good phone. this isn't even a gun. it's my hand. you take it away. take it. i work at the car wash. you know who i am. no, i don't want the phone. two years is too long to wait. introducing jump from t-mobile. upgrade when you want, not when you're told.
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♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: all right. here to perform her smash hit, "wrecking ball." oh, my god. sing along if you know the words. from her new album, "bangerz," once again, miley cyrus! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ we clawed, we chained our hearts in vain we jumped, never asking why we kissed ♪ ♪ i fell under your spell a love no one could deny but don't you ever say i just walked away ♪ ♪ i will always want you i can't live a lie running for my life i will always want you ♪
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♪ i came in like a wrecking ball i never hit so hard in love ♪ ♪ all i wanted was to break your walls all you ever did was wreck me ♪ ♪ yeah, you, you wreck me i put you high up in the sky and now, you're not coming down ♪ ♪ it slowly turned you let me burn and now, we're ashes on the ground ♪ ♪ but don't you ever say i just walked away i will always want you i can't live a lie ♪ ♪ running for my life i will always want you i came in like a wrecking ball ♪
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♪ i never hit so hard in love all i wanted was to break your walls ♪ ♪ all you ever did was wreck me i came in like a wrecking ball ♪ ♪ yeah, i just closed my eyes and swung left me crashing in a blazing fall ♪ ♪ all you ever did was wreck me yeah, you, you wreck me i never meant ♪ ♪ to start a war i just wanted you to let me in and instead of using force ♪ ♪ i guess i should've let you win i never meant to start a war ♪ ♪ i just wanted you to let me in i guess i should've
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let you win ♪ ♪ but don't you ever say i just walked away i will always want you i came in like ♪ ♪ a wrecking ball i never hit so hard in love all i wanted was to break your walls ♪ ♪ all you ever did was wreck me i came in like a wrecking ball ♪ ♪ yeah, i just closed my eyes and swung left me crashing in a blazing fall ♪ ♪ all you ever did was wreck me yeah, you, you wreck me yeah, you, you wreck me ♪ >> thank you. [ cheers and applause ]
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>> jimmy: well, doing it all. miley cyrus right here. wow. her new album, "bangerz," is in stores right now. be right back, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] ♪
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"i'm terry mcauliffe, candidate for governor, and i sponsored this ad." these are birth control pills. more than half of american women use them at some point in their lives but ken cuccinelli sponsored a bill that could have made common forms of birth control illegal, including the pill. cuccinelli was one of only five senators to support this "potentially radical intrusion into domestic, family and individual decision-making" why is ken cuccinelli interfering in our private lives? he's focused on his own agenda. not us. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: my thanks to miley cyrus, once again. and the greatest band in late night, the roots, everybody. stay tuned for carson daly. thank you for watching. have a great night. i hope to see you tomorrow.
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[ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪


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